“I never knew how angry I was until I became a parent.” iOS 15.4

I hear it from my clients…

I relate….

Maybe you do too?

Traditional anger management has been developed by people who don’t have “anger” issues ⚠️

I don’t know about you, but breathing through anger or counting to 10 never worked for me.

This week in Parenting for the Next Generation, we have been talking about supporting our anger as a parent.

While anger is a human emotion all people experience, racism in America prompts white people to do our work to challenge the “angry Black” person stereotype.

The expression of anger is both an individual experience based on temperament and a unique family and cultural experience.

Generally speaking, if you’re experiencing anger as a parent,  your anger IS justified – it’s simply misdirected.

✔️ You’ve probably been repressing your anger for decades.

✔️ And you’ve probably had legitimate life experiences that were wrong or injustices that you haven’t had the support to process.

❤️ While there’s no going back in time, there are ways we CAN learn to express and channel our anger in healthy, safe, positive ways – so our anger isn’t mistakenly directed at our children.

Here are some of my experiences supporting my anger as a parent.

Here‘s an article discussing the complexities of anger and some of the possible social benefits.

And what no one tells parents about anger…

Here are some of my favorite things to remind parents about our anger.

So many parents carry guilt, shame, or blame about their anger.

The key is learning how to BEFRIEND and CHANNEL our anger.

Anger is a natural human emotion designed to keep us safe.

Anger is your FIRE . It’s your passion and your sense of justice.

Anger can also be a sign of and response to STRESS for people with a “fight” response in times of “flipped lids.”

Anger is like raw energy: We get to decide what we do with it and how we can utilize it as fuel.

In order to develop a working relationship with our anger, we can’t wait until we’re feeling anger. At that point, we don’t have access to all the logical thinking and learning parts of our brain to develop a new relationship with anger.

Harnessing the positive potential of anger is learning how to express and integrate anger through our bodies in safe, healthy, and positive ways in calm and connected, not high-stress moments.

It’s all about developing a positive relationship with your anger and learning how to guide it.

Remember that most of us did not have a positive relationship with anger modeled for us as children.

I help you fill in the missing gaps around your own emotional development, so you can create a foundation of healthy emotional development in your family.

Together, we can create emotional safety in our families and model a healthy relationship with anger – and all our emotions – for our children.

Would you like to experience the Happy Home positive parenting coaching approach to transforming anger?

Click here to schedule a 1 hour coaching session here ($150) to set up your support plan today.

Sending all the best, and lots of love and empowerment to you and your family.

Here’s to developing a healthy relationship with all of our emotions. ❤️

p.s. Learning how to befriend and positively channel our emotions – and support our children in their healthy emotional development is some of the BIGGEST work we are doing as parents today. Let’s get you some positive and proactive support. Click here to schedule a 1 hour coaching session here ($150) to set up your support plan today.