Megan Barella
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this spring

3/31/2016

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Weekly Reflections + Lessons 

this month
i'm finishing grad school
moving
and launching my program
for parent trauma survivors
getting to gold
doesn't come easy

this spring is dedicated
to faith + grace
hard work
positive thoughts
patience
discipline
lots of kale + dancing
and shinning as i bright
as i can through all the changes
til i grab on to that light
at the end of the tunnel
and make it mine.

and for you, 
whatever you need
this spring
to bring you to the next level
of you
--- and all the support
you need to make it happen

You got this,
​Megan

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let your routines rule

3/28/2016

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Every holiday,
I'm reminded of the power
of rituals + routines
to guide our lives.
How it's been that way
since the beginning of 
human existence. 

That our brains
are pattern-seeking.

That if we want peace of mind,
and peace in our homes


We can let those Routines Rule.

Or be the boss.
Think about a preschool classroom...
What if everyday,
the teacher decided to do the class activities
in a different order.
Chaos would ensue.

Same concept applies to our homes.
If you're on inner rebel,
free spirit
like me
you may resistant doing.the.same.thing.everyday.
at.about.the.same.time.

So start small.
Pick one time of day.
Bedtime or morning routines.
Or a time when you notice
your family struggles.
Build a routine full of at least
one thing that motivates you
and your children.
Ask your children for input,
and how they want 
to be reminded of the routine.
And give it a go!

Be consistent,
for this next week.
And watch power struggles
lessen, and maybe disappear
all-together when you... 
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you can do it!

3/22/2016

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What if someone....
​followed you around
conveying unconditional
FAITH and BELIEVE
in your GOODNESS,
every day?

What if your parents gave you the gift
of guiding your behavior with 100% faith in you?
That would be your inner voice today.
Always secure and confident in who you are.

Didn't get that parental gift when you were little?

It's never too late
to give the gift
of believing in oneself
to yourself,
and your children.

We talk a lot about 
Positive Intent
in the Parenting for the Next Generation community,
and Positive Discipline's

Empowering Encouragement
(which parents call magic!)

It can all begin with this easy phrase:

You can do it!

And to celebrate accomplishments, successes, & happy moments:

You did it!

In real life, 
"You can do it!"
might sound like....

* You did it! You finished the puzzle!

* Time to clean up/ do homework. You can do it. 
(Then break the task down into smaller pieces and/or
get started to help them get moving.)

* When it's time to leave the store, we can do it
peacefully and quietly. If you need help, ask me.



Positive Parenting is scaffolding:
one positive communication tool
(that feels good to say & hear)
after another
---to motivate and bring out the best
in yourself and your children,
while teaching like skills.

Give "You can do it!" a try,
and let us know how it goes!
Remember the power of
tone of voice & facial expressions.
Embody that faith, belief, & trust
with your whole self.

Positive parenting is a practice,
an art form, and a community
of conscious parents.

Join the movement.


And this week,
wishing you the power of
unconditional faith + belief
in yourself and your children.



You can do it!
Megan


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vulnerability of your strength

3/20/2016

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Weekly Reflections + Lessons 

living every day
takes courage
don't let anyone tell ya any different

that life isn't at least part struggle
and for some it's all struggle
but hopefully that's not your story
life can certainly
feel like more struggle
than not

more to life
than the struggle
hard times
learning thru pain
you're way more than that
me too

lately 
been called
to rise up
to do something greater
than the sum total of me
something that isn't much about me
but about service
to humanity

Service to humanity is the best way to love your life


little me
moving into the big forward
of goodness
and that's scarier
than all my pain combined

to feel good
we gotta feel safe to feel good
much easier to keep hiding
where we feel comfortable
often holding us back all the while
being strong is vulnerable
vulnerability in our strength

but one day the voice
gets strong enough
whisper maybe still
but we listen
in baby steps
in leaps n bounds

stepping into 
The Gold
fully me in service to humanity
having fun
being really serious about how 
we transform ourselves
live our gifts
and our gold
change the world
one day at a time

here we go
to even it all out
i got a photo shoot scheduled

#staytuned
#GettingtoGoldProject
#balance
#loveyourlife




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yes, uh-huh, i see, tell me more...

3/14/2016

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In the Parenting for the Next Generation
community,
I half-jokingly tell parents,
everything you're doing today
is in preparation
for a smooth teen years.

Today,
you are building
a solid foundation
of trust + mutual respect.

Today,
you are developing
your children's inner compass.


Positive communication
(being able to talk 
and listen to one another)
is the rock of your foundation
and relationship with your children.
 

How to Talk So Kids Will Listen
& Listen So Kids Will Talk

is your ticket,
and one of my favorite parenting books.
​

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You want your children
to feel like they can tell you
*anything.*

Which means... 
today begin to work
towards responding
without judgement, criticism, or fixing.
It's not easy!

Start building trust
with the little stuff,
so if something serious
is going on
in your children's lives,
they know they'll be able to trust you. 

Say your child has said ______,
and you'd usually jump into
fixing, wishing it weren't so, or irritation.

Some examples might include:

"I hate school." or
"No school," for a little one.

"She is mean!" (about a friend)
or
"No sharing!"

Or any other uncomfortable statement
that comes out of your children's mouths
that deep down you wish
they weren't saying!

What do you do?
What do you say?


Step 1: 
Try simply saying back,
(deep breaths before speaking
are always a good idea!)
any of these simple responses:
​
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Step 2:
Add in:
"Tell me more."
Be sure to speak
in a neutral, compassionate way
--with more deep breaths!

The goal of:
Uh-huh...
Yes...
I see...

and
Tell me more?

For your children to:
* Fully empty out
& express themselves.
and
* Feel like,
"my parent gets me."

After your children are done talking,
and you've been fully listening,
add in the next step.

Step 3:
Simply state back
what you heard....
"You don't like school because
you want to be outside."

"You feel like your friend is mean
because she tells you what to do."

"You don't want to share because
you love to play with that toy."


To summarize this tool:
1) Deep breaths with
"Uh-huh..."
"Yes..."
"I see..."


2) Then,
"Tell me more..."

3) Reflect back what you hear.

Bingo.
Your children feel like,
"my parent understands me!"

From this place
of understanding,
you can effectively move into
problem-solving or making a plan.

Ready to give it a try?
Or maybe this tool is a reminder of
what you're already doing?

Remember:
​
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So please be gentle with you.
Be your own coach and inner advocate,
so you can do the same for your children.

We're here to support one another!
And stay active in our positive parenting practice.
Which is exactly why I offer:

The Parenting for the Next Generation
Online Class + Community.

The next session begins April 2nd!
Click here to get on the wait list
& receive special program offers.
Enrollment opens March 21st.


This week,
wishing you the power of
positive communication
with your children
---and all the support in the world
so you can live the power of YOU.


​
You got this,

Megan

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Ready to Unlock Your Parenting Power? Join the Parenting for the Next Generation Online Class + Community. Enrollment opens March 21st. For more info and to join the wait list, click here.
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believe in you

3/13/2016

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Reflections + Lessons from my week

a different kind of wind
blew this week
eclipse time
always crazy powerful for me
always something getting eclipsed
or trying to 
letting go of the old
so the new growth
that's always been there
can shine through

right now
​this is the best i've ever felt 
mentally + emotionally
and yet tired
like i'm using all of me
for the first time
ever
tending, tending, tending to me
as my sister reminded me 
in her eclipse reading

honestly
i feel like a totally different person
me
for sure
but with my gold
so good
secure
confident in myself
exactly like i hope
for the parents i serve

and yet
life is still life
not perfect
but it can still be awesome 

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as i focus on 
sharing my story
and supporting
parents who are trauma survivors
i'm very tired
it takes all i have

inch by inch
one foot in front of the other
believing in oneself
goodness in you
and making positive action steps
based on your faith in yourself

if we can do that in a day
what else is there?
we done good.

This week, wishing you an infinite well of faith in you, and your goodness.
Believe that you are worthy of living your gold.

All the best,
Megan

 

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​p.s. Stay tuned for more info about "The Getting to Gold Project." Special thanks to Iluska Ikeda Studio, Made to Mother, and Joyful Courage for collaborating and featuring my work for parent trauma survivors.
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when you feel like a good parent....

3/7/2016

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I always wish I could wave
a magic wand 
for the parents in my community,
(and for myself) 
and make everything perfect.
Parenting, and life.
Wouldn't that be great?

But the essence of LIFE
is our learning and growing.
And bottom line is 
I don't have a magic wand.

But I do know about parenting magic,
the magic + power of YOU.

Parenting and life will never be perfect.
But they can still be AWESOME.

Your parenting + life magic,
rooted in your AWESOMENESS---
is one of the main things
we work on together
in the Parenting for the Next Generation
Online Class + Community.
(Next session begins April 2nd!

Click here to get on the wait list
& receive special program offers )

Here's a little parenting secret 
that every parent should know,
and that I share with parents in my community:
​
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Simple truth.
Runs deeps.

This week,
simply notice
as a 
Gentle Observer,
when you feel like a good parent,
and when you don't.

Then get out your "save" button
and save a picture of your
awesomely, good parenting self.

Take out this image of your 
"feeling good parenting self"
and practice feeling and thinking
this way throughout your day.


Eventually,
you'll be able to call in
your "feeling good self"
to help you deal with AND
transform the harder stuff 
of parenting and life.

My goals for you?
* That you can learn to access
and live your feeling good self,
every day.
* And that you feel worthy
of living your goodness,
everyday.

This week,
wishing you lots of magic,
feeling good,
and awesomeness
rooted in the power of YOU.


You got this,

Megan

p.s. Parenting for the Next Generation 4 week online program begins April 2nd-- 
Unlock Your Parenting Power! Sign up below for updates + special offers.
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fierce + free

3/5/2016

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Reflections + Lessons from the week

My son had a play date one day after school this week.
We left school hand-in-hand to cross the street.

I do this thing to get cars to stop,
so we can cross the street.
I take one step into the street. 
Stand up straight.
Look serious.
Confident.
Very New York.
I stare straight at the car,
even if they are far away.
With Wonder Woman like power, 
I announce our intention to that car. 
And I stop that car with my energy.
With my force.
A command of my presence,
and my place in the world.

It feels about as fierce as I get.
To make things happen in daily life.
To ensure children in my care are safe. 

I realized this week,
how much I love this random + fierce act
that simultaneously claims my space in the world.
My right to be.
My ability to protect and keep children safe.
To make my intention known both energetically and physically,
respectfully and powerfully.
And then to follow my intention through into positive action. 
What a powerfully simple act this crossing of the street becomes.

How can I capture that energy, power, intention
to the places in my life
I feel more weak, less confident?
That fierceness to protect,
to make known my intentions
and follow through with them
in everyday life. 

And how can you do this same?
This week, here's my wish for you...
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You got this,
Megan

p.s. This week's post inspired in part by the work of catherinesolizrey.com. If you are a woman in business, check out Catherine's work for some serious inspired fierceness to bring your dreams into reality. 
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    Categories

    All
    Getting To Gold
    Positive Parenting
    Reflections
    Summer Magic

    Mama Megan

    Hi friends,  I write from the heart to tell my life story, and the story of those in my neighborhood called life. Research shows that our children's emotional & mental health is contingent upon us parents being able to tell our life story, or "coherent narrative."  This is my coherent narrative, my life story in the making, with some of what I love in life too. My goal is to share my life in a way that is real, uplifting & positive- sometimes serious, sometimes fun. In my practice, I inspire parents to empowerment through reclaiming our life stories and learning respectful discipline. My work is my offering to our children- our future. Wishing you all a happy family!

    Picture
    Photo by J Jean Portraits

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