by Rachel Hadiashar
We're on day 8 or 9 of snow days this school year in the Portland area. Some of the time at home has been really sweet.
happy kids frolicking in the snow
sledding, homemade hot cocoa, cooking projects,
and games & crafting time
sweet + funny moments,
like my ninja-chopper son in the kitchen
Over the last few days,
we had some wonderful times with friends.
But life isn't all Facebook glossy.
And I'm a work-from-home, single mama.
When my son is home from school with me,
I'm either telling him
(Or sadly, yelling)
"one more minute" all day long.
Or letting work go so I can try my best
to be present with him.
Neither one is ideal,
and the work-home balance starts to stress me out.
Whether you're nursing a baby
with a 3 year old who wants to play.
Or figuring out how you're going to
get your kids to all their activities this week,
homework done, and dinner on the table
-- all before bedtime.
Or your kids fighting is driving you crazy.
Whatever balancing act,
you got going on in your life
--- I worry for all of us.
When the stress becomes too much.
The scales tip.
The stress takes us over,
and hijacks our moments.
We yell at our kids
-- for behavior they did yesterday
that didn't bother us one bit.
We feel like bad parents,
and the guilt locks us into a negative cycle.
Our children's negative behavior intensifies.
If a pattern like this continues
throughout our children's childhood
-- it shapes their character.
And as a parent, our lives can become miserable.
This makes me wanna cry.
I do cry.
Because I know it's preventable.
We can interrupt negative stress cycles with our kids.
One of the best ways to gently, oh so gently,
-- but powerfully too --
interrupt this negative cycle of yelling at your kids
is to forget about your kids' crazy behavior
for even a minute,
and bring it back to you.
This simple phrase said to yourself,
right when you notice
your frustration levels rising
is magic to transform the urge to yell,
and negative cycles with your children.
It reminds you that everything really is ok.
Helps you stay calm,
by giving yourself the support,
you need to support your children
--- and be present + patient with them.
This is just one of the hundreds of tools
we're practiced + developed together
in our positive parenting community
throughout the last 5 years.
we're starting something new.
So you have access to
all the tools + support you'll ever need,
You Got This is peace of mind that everyday
you can do the crazy balancing act of parenting
--- and love it because you finally have support you need.
And this week,
when you feel yourself getting stressed,
triggered, and wanting to yell
--- give yourself the deep love + support
you'd offer a dear friend.
Say gently, but powerfully to yourself
"It's all ok."
Because in the big picture,
everything is all good.
You're doing wonderfully.
You Got This.
Have a wonderful week, everyone!
All the best,
Hi friends, I write from the heart to tell my life story, and the story of those in my neighborhood called life. Research shows that our children's emotional & mental health is contingent upon us parents being able to tell our life story, or "coherent narrative." This is my coherent narrative, my life story in the making, with some of what I love in life too. My goal is to share my life in a way that is real, uplifting & positive- sometimes serious, sometimes fun. In my practice, I inspire parents to empowerment through reclaiming our life stories and learning respectful discipline. My work is my offering to our children- our future. Wishing you all a happy family!