by Rachel Hadiashar
Whenever you leave the house,
you have snacks packed for the kids
- but not you.
- what's that?
....Your 2 year old is a hot mess every day after 4 pm.
....Your preschooler grabs toys and hits at every playgroup.
....Homework is a fight every night.
This is the kinda real life stuff
that we totally forget about it-
but then magically the same thing happens
the very next week,
or the next day.
It's the worst.
There is another way, mamas.
A way to begin to feel on top of your world,
rather than 3 steps behind.
It takes a bit of awareness/presence,
a whole lotta compassion,
and some problem-solving.
Prepping for success is pretty straight-forward.
But like all the positive parenting tools it definitely takes practice.
(So be sure to head over here with any questions.)
#1 See clearly + neutrally what the negative pattern is.
Without judgment of good or bad.
It just is.
This can be so hard to do.
#2 Identify the positive pattern you'd rather see happening instead.
... I will feed and hydrate myself as I do my children.
... We'll have a mellow afternoon reading and playing out front,
instead of running errands with an over-tired child.
... I'll talk to my preschooler about how to ask for a turn with a toy and remind that we'll be gentle with our hands at playgroup. If we need a break, we'll take one. And then I'll remind my little one before we leave the house, in the car, and throughout playgroup- in a clear but gentle way.
... I'll talk to my 2nd, 5th or 9th grader and ask,
"what are your ideas to make homework time more fun?"
Whatever we decide, I'll remind her/him about the plan
in the morning and after school.
A # 1 way to transform the ruts of life and parenting.
To let go of reactivity,
and step into proactivity.
To feel on top of your world
- no matter how crazy life gets it.
All the wisdom is already inside you.
It just takes practice to create that new pattern.
Prepping for success will help you on the way
to your positive pattern.
You Got This.
All the best,
I've fallen so many times as a parent,
I can't even count.
The up's -n- downs to parenting are infinite.
Because the ability to
and to ultimately blossom again
in parenting is exponential.
We have to be willing to fall,
to rise again- even stronger.
If you celebrate Easter,
I hope you had a wonderful holiday!
We certainly did.
Here's my thoughts on the significance of Easter.
This spring time of year reminds me
of the importance of rebirth + renewal.
That there is no shame (absolutely none!)
in messing up.
For in every challenge,
and every lesson,
every single hard time
--- there is also opportunity
to keep growing + changing.
To learn and become more + more of who YOU are.
This is the work we do together in positive parenting.
We help you become more you.
But this work is vulnerable + scary.
While I truly in my heart-of-hearts know:
We can do it.....
That everything is just an opportunity
to step into that blossom of who we are.
I also know it's wayyyyyyy hard.
We need each other.
And the old way isn't going to cut it.
The cool thing is we have each other.
And it's our children who are leading us
(sometimes dragging us lol)
into the new way.
During this spring season of rebirth + renewal,
I encourage you to keep believing in yourself.
To be open to change,
in big + small ways.
To keep trying.
To find the strength + courage
to try the same thing
in a new or slightly different way.
And to stay tuned for more details
in a couple days of ways
our community is supporting you
to grow + blossom.
To become that full essence of who you are.
Here's to a time of maximum blossoming for all us.
You Got This.
Lots of love,
Lovin' my new logo by Creative 88 Media. Go give 'em a like.
Your newborn is crying hysterically in the grocery store.
Your toddler is over-tired and tantruming at the park.
Your 8 year old is hungry and throwing a fit at a birthday party.
Your teen throws attitude wherever you go.
THIS is the face of parenting.
It's neither pretty,
Or FB worthy.
But it's real.
And the problem isn't that these moments happen.
It's what happens after these moments....
When you feel everyone's eyes on you.
-- or suddenly everyone is staring at the floor.
When you feel judged and self-conscious.
The problem is NOT you or your children.
It's our society.
We've lost an understanding of human development.
That parents need each other to make everyday happen.
The cultural expectation that parenting is tidy is CRAZY.
Reality is: no one has it "together"
-- not alone that is.
We have it together as parents
only when we have each other's BACKS.
Assume Your Mama Stance.
It says you and your children BELONG.
That parenting is MESSY,
and we ACCEPT messiness in ourselves + our children
-- and in our community of families everywhere.
In those messy + real moments...
Take a deep breath.
Your Mamas Stance will give the mamas around you
permission to do the same.
In your mama stance,
when you see a fellow mama struggling...
offer her a loving smile,
or an actual helping hand.
You and your children have a RIGHT to BE,
and right to be SUPPORTED
-- especially when it's messy.
We're in this mess of parenting and life TOGETHER.
Sending you all the support in the world
-- and the power to Assume Your Mama Stance.
You Got This.
Lots of love,
This is the face I make when someone tells me to "Just Breathe."
Or I look like I wanna throw something at someone.
I don't know about you,
but when I'm feeling...
I don't wanna hear someone tell me to
"Just Breathe" through it.
Because in that moment,
I don't feel...
- nor do I want to.
And that's my honest truth.
It took me a long time to reclaim the power of my breath.
Deep breathing isn't about feeling calm.
When you take a deep breathe,
it's accessing your power to wash away life's stresses.
The stress is still there.
It's real, but it doesn't own you.
With your deep breathing,
you become stronger than your stress.
The stress lives outside rather than within you.
So this week,
if you feel
or like you wanna yell
-- Find your breath.
Breathe in the Power of You
with some deep belly breaths.
Whether your kids are fighting in the grocery store,
you skipped a meal,
the baby kept you up all night,
or you're seriously worried about ______,
the quickest way to connect with the strongest part of you is to...
Not to feel calm or peaceful
(although awesome if you do),
but rather to connect with your breath
- the strongest,
part of you.
So you can get through each moment
more fully connected to your highest self,
-- and keep stress outside, not within you.
This is the power of your breath.
just breathe, my friends.
just breathe. :)
You Got This.
Lots of love,
p.s. Do you get my weekly emails full of life inspiration and positive parenting empowerment? Register below to join the fun and the community here.
Hi friends, I write from the heart to tell my life story, and the story of those in my neighborhood called life. Research shows that our children's emotional & mental health is contingent upon us parents being able to tell our life story, or "coherent narrative." This is my coherent narrative, my life story in the making, with some of what I love in life too. My goal is to share my life in a way that is real, uplifting & positive- sometimes serious, sometimes fun. In my practice, I inspire parents to empowerment through reclaiming our life stories and learning respectful discipline. My work is my offering to our children- our future. Wishing you all a happy family!